Sometimes I just want a peaceful ride on the bus. I want to entertain my own thoughts, or just clear my head during the duration of getting from point A to point B. I never leave home without my iPod; sometimes I just don’t feel like listening to music. Cell phone users disrupt this process. They are rude, boisterous, and selfish.
If you are going to disturb me by having me listen to your conversation, I should be entitled to hear the complete conversation; not just the blips. Blips leave out the what, when, who and dang of the conversation.
For instance, a couple of days ago on my way to class at Berkeley College I caught the 6:40am number 3 bus from Highland Avenue in Yonkers. Although, I was feeling good that morning, I had some things on my mind, I needed to sort through and I was welcoming the one hour and ten minutes it took to get to the campus. Lo and Behold though, a woman of my age (tender) enters the bus with cell phone in hand, sits across from me (as if there weren’t any other available seats), dials a number and has the following one-side conversation:
“I’m on the bus now”
“yeah”
“Oh heck no, I have finals!”
“For real?”
“What Dukie say?”
“No he didn’t?”
“I told you”
“Now I’m at South Broadway & Nepperhan”
“Um hm”
“Um hm”
“For real?”
“But I thought”
(Hysterical laughing)
“Um hmm, I got a prescription for that too”
“He said….”
(Hysterical laughing)
“Girl! This my stop, I talk with you later”
I was perturbed pretty much because my thoughts were interrupted, and I was being held captive by her conversation. However, I got into the conversation, staring at her, which made her unconfortable - but not enough to hang up. I really wanted to know was what the other person was saying. I thought I’d be getting the 411 on Dukie, but, I got nothing; and a prescription for what? All those um hms, and hysterical laughing what was that all about? So, I was left to plug in the blips myself and this is how I processed the conversation:
Girl on other end of phone: “Hello. What up, Keisha? I can’t believe you up this early. Oh I forgot you have a class at eight o’clock.
Keisha: “I’m on the bus now”
Girl on other end of phone: “Did you finish your paper on psychology last night?
Keisha: “Yeah”
Girl on other end of phone: Girl! I went out last night to the Salt & Pepper Bar and got my groove on. I got in here late because their last set is at 1:30am. Wanna come with me next Sunday?
Keisha: “Oh heck no, I have finals!”
Girl on other end of phone: “Oh, and this guy, not so good looking. He walks up to me and asks if he can buy me drink and some chow. I was like, chow who even say that word anymore?
Keisha: “For Real?”
Girl on other end of phone: “Word yo and I told him no!” “Anyway girl, I roll in the house at 3:00 in the morning, dead tired.
Keisha: “What Dukie say?”
Girl on other end of phone: “He asked, if I cooked breakfast yet”
Keisha: “No he didn’t?”
Girl on other end of phone: “All he thinks about is food”
Keisha: “I told you”
Girl on other end of phone: “Where are you?”
Keisha: “Now I’m at South Broadway & Nepperhan”
Girl on other end of phone: “So I tell Dukie, that it’s after 3:00 in the morning. He finally looks at the clock and asks where I been all night, so I tell him. He gets mad, tells me that no wife of his should be out this time of the morning; yet, I should be making him breakfast!”
Keisha: “Um hm”
Girl on other end of phone: Breakfast! The smell of bacon would wake up the whole building, what would people think? That my husband is eating breakfast morning, noon, and night and that’s all I know how to cook?
Keisha: “Umhm”
Girl on other end of phone: “He likes big breakfast and not the McDonald’s size big breakfast, he likes 6 pancakes, 8 slices of bacon, 4 eggs and 3 biscuits”
Keisha: “For real”
Girl on other end of phone: “Yeah girl, and a pitcher of super sweet grape Kool Aid”
Keisha: “But I thought”
Girl on other end of phone: “He was on a diet? That is his diet. He used to eat 8 pancakes! He got upset the other day when the doctor told him his pressure was up and he needed to lose weight. He then turn to me, and ask if I thought he needed to lose weight. I say: “lose it, misplace it, something…”
Keisha is laughs hysterically.
Girl on other end of phone: “Anyway girl, enough about Dukie. Oh, Oh not yet. We leave the doctor’s office fill his prescription for his pressure medicine at the pharmacy down the block”
Keisha: “Um hm, I got a prescription for that too”
Girl on other end of phone: “There is a Dunkin Donuts directly across the street from the pharmacy and…”
Keisha: “He said…”
Girl on other end of phone: “Baby, can I get their 12 donuts for six dollars?”
Keisha laughs hysterically, says that last bit about this being her stop, hangs up phone, and exits the bus.
I’m sure the conversation went nothing like this; But, if you don't want me to make it up, then put your phone on speaker; since you are already disturbing me. It's the only decent thing to do other than shutting up!
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